Konoha Academy Host Club
by 3ntitylvr
Summary: In an instant all eyes were on Deidara and he felt his future at Kanoha Academy get flushed down the toilet. He had come there to become a sculpture and hopefully see his childhood friend Sasori but so far there had been no Sasori, no time to himself, and now this. The only thing he could say was, "…uh-oh…"


Well here I am again with yet another fanfiction. Wow, I just keep spitting them out don't I? Well this one has been an idea I've had for a while and I thought I'd try it out. Hope you guys like it. I would like no flagging for this. I'm not too sure why I'd get flags but I'm gonna point it out anyway. I am doing a good disclaimer for each chapter so there.

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Naruto and I also make no money from this

**Warnings**: yaoi, light incest, possible ooc

So enjoy

**Konoha Academy Host Club**

**Chapter 1**

"I'M NOT A GIRL, un!" a blond streak raced through the hallways of Konoha High School trying to get away from the mob of guys. Deidara raced around the corner and had to jump to the side to avoid running into yet another guy. Contrary to what most of the school's population believes Deidara is indeed a boy and unfortunately his rather feminine looks had him dodging molestors about ten times a day. Putting on a burst of speed he rounded a corner only to fall flat on his ass when he hit something. He looked up to glare at the thing to find another blond looking down at him with a rather confused expression.

Naruto looked at the girl that had just run into him for a minute before smiling kindly. "Hello dear lady, would you like some help up?"

The girl growled at him before kicking his legs out from under him and saying, "I am a boy you jerk! A BOY, YEAH!" The sound of many male voices approaching fast made Deidara sweat. He turned to the kid he had just tripped and with pleading eyes begged, "Hide me, please!"

Naruto blinked from his position on the floor rather surpirsed at being there. He looked at the now pleading girl and smiled kindly as he stood, "Of course my precious flower. Come with me." And with that he pulled the still fuming Deidara off the ground and started running down the hall and soon into an abandoned classroom.

Deidara blinked in slight confusion as he took in the occupants of the room as the clueless blond kid walked past him over to a rather stoic looking male with a clipboard and a high ponytail. "Shika! Look! I rescued this poor girl from a mob of unsavory male animals!"

Shikamaru scowled slightly at the boy now staring at them. _Naruto is completely dense_, was his only thought. He looked at the slightly deistressed teenage male and grunted, "Troublesome," softly to himself.

Deidara screamed in surprise (sounding a lot like a girl) as a small bundle glomped him so hard he fell to the ground. "Tobi likes the new girl!" came an excited kidlike voice from the thing that kept him on his back. "Tobi wanna keep her forever!"

Deidara squirmed under the small boy and tried to get him off, "Get off pipsqueak, un! And I'm not a-"

He was cut off by a loud wailing above him as the small boy started crying, "NEJI! He called me a pipsqueak!" And with that the boy who called himself Tobi jumped off the blond and ran over to a stoic looking male with long hair pulled behind him in a loose ponytail. He then proceeded to attach himself to that boy crying as hard as he could.

The boy named Neji just looked down at Tobi and gave a small smile before patting him on the head.

Deidara blinked in confusion and started saying something before he froze when he felt the presence of two people behind him. Slowly turning around he gaped at the male pair standing too close for comfort. One who was obviously older was simply breathtaking...even though Deidara was straight. His long ebony hair was tied in a ponytail at the nape of his neck and his tall slender figure covered in porcelein skin was just amazing. The shorter and younger boy next to him had to be his relative, most likely his brother, as they looked very similar. This one wore his short ebony hair lose except for the back which was spiked up, making it look much like a chicken's ass, and his face was a tad different from the older counterpart.

The long-haired one smiled mischievously, "Well Sasuke, look what Naruto brought in this time!"

"I see Itachi, she looks rather tasty don't you think?" the younger one responded.

Suddenly Deidara felt all the heat rush to his face. Not from what Sasuke had said but from what Itachi was now doing. He had suddenly grabbed Sasuke and pulled him against his tall frame, tilting his head up to gaze into his eyes. He then whispered seductively, "Not as tasty as you baby brother."

Sasuke blushed and looked away slightly. "Itachi," he moaned, "not here, please. You're embarrassing me!"

Itachi leaned closer and licked Sasuke's neck lightly before saying, "But I just can't help it Sasu. You're too beautiful."

Deidara backed away slowly with a hand over his nose to stop the oncoming nosebleed. "Holy Shit!"

Still in their intimate pose but now with slightly bored expressions on, Itachi and Sasuke looked over at Deidara and said as one, "Well that was something we didn't expect a lady to say." They both straightened up as if nothing had happened and looked at each other before smiling. None of their other customers had ever swore before so they knew right there that this was a guy...a rather peculier guy that got embarrassed and slightly excited by incestual relationships between two brothers...but a guy none-the-less.

Naruto, as Diedara now knew him, stepped forward and bowed. "Welcome to the Kanoha Academy Host Club, my princess." He smiled at Deidara and continued, "What type do you fancy? The strong silent type?" He gestured towards Neji. "The shota type," Tobi looked up and gave a cute smile while still wiping away some tears. "The incestual brothers type?" Itachi wrapped his arms around Sasuke and pulled him against him in an embrace that was definitely more than what normal brothers should share. "Or the cool type?" Shikamaru looked up from writing something in his notebook and gave a somewhat knowing smile towards the now completely red blond.

Deidara stuttered as he tried to explain his way out of this. "_Why do I have to look like a girl?_" he thought desperately to himself. He was brought back to the present when he felt fingers on his chin and soon found himself staring into the bluest eyes imaginable.

"Or maybe you're into a guy like me." As Naruto's lips descened Deidara took that moment to totally freak out. He pushed againt the chest in front of him hard making Naruto stumble backwards and into a rather expensive looking vase that soon shattered into a million pieces on the ground. "Ow!" came the annoyed voice from amidst the shattered pieces.

In an instant all eyes were on Deidara and he felt his future at Kanoha Academy get flushed down the toilet. He had come there to become a sculpture and hopefully see his childhood friend Sasori but so far there had been no Sasori, no time to himself, and now this. The only thing he could say was, "…uh-oh…"

* * *

**A/N**

So how did you guys like that? I know that I still have other fanfictions to update but I am working on those and well I just wanted to try out this idea. I'll update this one once I get some reviews telling me whether people like this or not. I also want to say that I will not be following the line of Ouran Host Club which is why there is no disclaimer for it. I just used the beginning part because it helped. And yes the placements were inspired by Ouran. If someone believes I need to add it into the disclaimer please tell me. But I'm sure others have done this before. Anyway.

Peace-Out ^-^v

EntityLvr


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